We are spiritual beings. Sex is just a physical manifestation of a little lust, and when you remove all the spiritual components, you get porn: a very fake, somewhat ridiculous dark-side that feeds fetishes and addiction. It doesn't fulfill but maintains. But enhance the spiritual nature of being with someone, and the sex is a heavenly romance out of a movie that most people are seeking.
Chemistry and Essence
If you want things to flow more naturally without much effort, you want to be with a partner you have chemistry with. But if the chemistry isn't there, you can create your own chemistry by trying to feel his essence and loving it for what it is.
A guy you barely know is easier to do this with because of the mystery. You can get lost in illusions of what he could be and what if's. He can be anything you want at that point in the game.
However, when you get to know a guy well, like being married for 10 years, that mystery is gone, and you have to feel his essence for what it is. Focus on the things you love about him, and try to feel those things emitting invisibly from his body, like a scent for your soul to feel.
The important thing to the secret of amazing sex is to feel him with your inner being. Try to embrace him as a spirit, like a ghost in front of your face. What do you feel when you get close to him? Let it send chills down your back. Hold your breath and let him breathe for you for a second. Feel his essence: his wants and desires trying to wrap itself around you.
As you tease yourself, you are teasing him. Get close up for that kiss, and instead of jumping for the kiss, hang out there for a while. Maybe whisper witty things, or don't say a word. Nuzzle the noses a little. Rub your lips against his cheek, barely touching the outer part of his lips, and back to the cheek and play around before getting to that kiss.
Tease yourself every step of the way. Go for it, but then hold back like you are afraid of losing your innocence. Don't just grab his goodies. Make him want you to grab his manhood so bad he is squirming before every really touching the pork.
This is easiest to do with a man you haven't been with yet, one who is afraid to go the next step unsure of what you might do. When dealing with a man who is not afraid to just grab your boobs and honk them, it gets more difficult to tease. You can talk about it, but talking about it ruins the moment. Your best bet is to move his hands for him. Take control of the situation, and hold him back until you are ready to let him go.
Wait Until You are Thirsty
When you get to a point where you want nothing else but to be one with him, for his soul to intertwine with yours, for you to want to drink him, taste him, have all of him in you and on you... Then wait another moment and tease yourself into the oneness.
The reason for this is it takes time to for the spirits to connect on a sexual level. We are spiritual beings, but we don't often consciously move in the spirit. You are trying to align your spirit with his into the same desires and passion for that oneness, and once the spirits are one, the body craves to be one.
Short, but SweetWhen you use sex to turn yourself on, I, at least, get to a point where I start debating:
"Do I really feel like doing all this work? Just seems like going to the gym. You know what also sounds good right now besides an orgasm? Hot wings, and I don't have to sweat and work for hot wings, but I do have to leave and drive and wait. Can I afford hot wings? How rude would it be to just stop now and get hot wings? Wait, I'm trying to get turned on. Ok. Think about porn. Think about that celebrity. Just focus. Damn, this is taking forever. "
But when you wait like I'm telling you in this article, sex doesn't become an all day event where you are kind of hoping for an end. You don't hope for an end. You want to stay in the moment as long as you can, and the end just happens. You get creative with the positions and are more willing to try something new. You are more willing to engage in positions that are less comfortable just to keep yourself from an orgasm for another minute. You catch yourself trying to time yours with his. If he finishes before you, you are only a few grinds away from finishing yourself that it doesn't matter.
A lot of times, only minutes have passed, but they were amazing minutes in slow motion, and intense enough to make you ponder about a round 2.
The Secret to Amazing Sex: The Spiritual ConnectionSex is a very spiritual connection, a channeling of each other's energies. If you allow the darkness to control your sexual expressions, your sex will take on a dark role that leaves you unfulfilled. If you allow the light, the love, the romance, the passion, ignite your escapades, you are giving your spirit the touch it truly desires.
The secret to amazing sex is to make your spirits one first, and the bodies will then desire to be one. The alternative is to make the bodies one first and let the spirits follow, but that method allows that darkness of the material world dictate the connection. Letting the spirits combine first gives your sexual experience meaning and purpose and is far more satisfying to what you are truly craving from the situation.
The sex is only as good as your spiritual connection. Focus on the spirit between you and the one you are with.
Featured image courtesy of Will Vision